Recently, I reread a portion of my mother’s (Kathleen C. Bishop) memoirs which were published in the book “Fort Fairfield – It’s Time to Tell our Stories- 1858 – 2008” Editors: Rayle Reed Ainsworth and Sarah Ulman 2009 (Hardcover published by Frontier Heritage Society).
Mom wrote her story of her childhood in 2002- five years before she passed away. She had clarity of mind before dementia set in and I am so grateful that she entrusted me with those precious hand-written pages. (She knew that I would take care of them and have them published.) I still have many letters that she wrote to me while I was working in Ogunquit, Maine (1969) and later, in California (1970 – 71)and in Saugerties, NY. My mother had a passion for writing and late in life, she confessed to me that she wished she had used this talent to a greater degree. What she didn’t understand was that her letters to family and friends forged a bond between us and her. It doesn’t matter that the whole world didn’t read her thoughts. Those of us who were privileged to have access to her words of comfort (and some anxiety as well) were blessed with her love and friendship.
Mom was ahead of her time in the 1950s, in that, she started her own business while most women were housewives. In the beginning, she raised poodles in the basement of our homestead and later, had a large kennel built in our backyard which housed several breeds of dogs. Even though she worked long hours, we (her children) knew where to find her.
Although, she had her faults (like all of us), she taught me how to be brave in a man’s world of business. She introduced me to commerce when I was 12 years old by encouraging me to raise and sell Beagles. She stood quietly by me when I sold my first drawing of woman’s face to a local businessman from Presque Isle, Maine. He asked me how much I wanted for it and I replied, “$10.” Next, he said, “I will give you $5.” Emphatically and without hesitation, I said, “NO!” Immediately, he gave me the $10. My mom did not say a word, but I could see how proud she was of me for standing firmly on what I believed.
When I was a child, I wrote poetry for my mother. I saw how much she loved reading what I wrote. Thinking that I was an artist at an early age, I painted for her admiring eyes. She displayed all of my artwork so that family, friends and all of her customers could see them, too.
Although my mother had some serious flaws, I choose to concentrate on the positive influences that she had on me. She became spiritual late in life and expressed sorrow for the errors of her earlier ways. God used her to teach me many things, one of which is to always be sure of what I believed to be right and to express these beliefs with confidence. The greatest bond that I ever had with my mother was the practice of praying together – when I was a child and then, later in her life when I could sense that she meant every word she said. She came to God like a child – believing with all of her heart. My mother went to be with our Lord at age 91 in 2007.
The influence that some people have on our lives is immeasurable. We all have such a great potential to love – I feel as though I am just scratching the surface of it. But I know – the more I depend on God – the more I will be able to express it in everyway. I thank God for using my mom to show me unconditional Love and for those people who choose to express love to me today.